In conjunction with the launch of my new book this month, Better Than Perfect: 7 Strategies to Crush Your Inner Critic and Create a Life You Love, I’ve written articles on perfectionism for multiple magazines. Here’s my latest for SUCCESS. Read. Share. Tweet! -E
Is Perfectionism Bringing Down Your Business?
5 tips on how to deal with a perfectionist co-worker
-by Elizabeth Lombardo
Have you ever struggled to work with people who weren’t team players? Maybe they refused to listen to others, dismissed feedback, behaved arrogantly or even refused to do their share of a project?
Take these frustrating examples:
• My boss drives me crazy. He micromanages everything and never lets me work on my own. He treats me like a child.
• My colleague takes forever to get me her part of a project. And then she’s always making revisions, messing up what I already spent time doing.
• I can’t stand working with him. He thinks his ideas are the only ones that have merit.
These crazy-making people are perfectionists. You may think that a perfectionist is someone who likes things to be neat and orderly, but there’s much more to it than that.
Read this entire article at SUCCESS.com
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I adore the good folks at Fox 32 and Good Day Chicago!
I’ve been doing a recurring segment on there about many popular topics and issues. This one was very special as we talked about my new book Better Than Perfect: 7 Strategies to Crush Your Inner Critic and Create a Life You Love.
Better Than Perfect is available at major online book retailers (i.e. Amazon, Barnes & Noble) and at local bookstores nationwide. BTP recently made Amazon’s Bestseller list! Get a copy today for yourself or someone you love.
You should also take my Are You a Perfectionist? Quiz. I’ll send you personalized results and a link to download my ebook 10 Ways Perfectionism May be Poisoning Your Life.
Thanks so much for taking this journey with me!
The world watched Ferguson MO erupt in the aftermath of the police shooting death of Michael Brown.
While the protests and headlines have waned; the grief that Michael Brown’s loved ones feel persists.
Steve Harvey asked me to join him in an on air session with Michael’s mother Leslie McPhadden. We’ve included the entire clip, so that you can see and feel Leslie’s grief and the genuine empathy and passion from Steve and me.
Some have asked…Yes, I spent much, much more time one-on-one with Leslie off camera
Put aside your political and cultural biases. Observe and relate to a mother’s agony. Watch it. Share it. Pray for peace and healing — for Michael Brown’s loved ones, Ferguson and our divided nation.
By Amelia Harnish for Health.com
Everyone has a friend or loved one obsessed with perfection. The one who works constantly because they’re utterly terrified of letting their boss down, or the mom who won’t let anyone help around the house because no one else does it “right.” Or perhaps you’re the perfectionist in your life? It’s okay. Just admit it. Because the sooner you do, the sooner you can let go of it—and all of its hefty side effects.
Case in point: Earlier this week, a new analysis in the Review of General Psychology found that perfectionism can literally ruin your life. Perfectionists are more likely to struggle with depression or anxiety, and sadly, they’re more likely to commit suicide, the paper argues.
While we tend to hold up perfectionism as a sign of being a high-achiever, “the average person has very little understanding or awareness of how destructive perfectionism can be,” the paper’s lead author Gordon Flett, PhD, told New York magazine’s Science of Us blog. For many perfectionists, underneath the outward appearance of having it together, they feel like total imposters, which can be really draining, he added.
“Perfectionists have an all-or-nothing mindset that’s propelled by a crippling fear of failure. They also have what’s called conditional self-worth. They think ‘I am only a good person if I can achieve these things,’” explains Elizabeth Lombardo, PhD, a clinical psychologist and author of Better Than Perfect: 7 Strategies to Crush Your Inner Critic and Create a Life You Love. Since true perfection is impossible, “you can see how someone with that mindset could get to a dark place.”
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I originally wrote this for Entrepreneur.com
There is an epidemic sweeping our nation. Its victims suffer from failed businesses, marriages and even diets. It doesn’t discriminate and can attack anyone striving for success. What is this plague crippling our country? It’s called perfectionism. And the paralysis of perfection can be a dream killer for many entrepreneurs.
Perfectionism is the all-or-nothing attitude that sounds like these: “I haven’t figured out my logo yet. I can’t make business cards without a logo. I can’t go to a networking event without business cards. I guess I’ll just stay home.”
This sort of perfectionism stimulates stress, crushes creativity, prevents productivity and ultimately prunes profitability.
Most perfectionists don’t even realize they are one. They cling to the belief that their obsessive pursuit of perfection is really just the definition of doing a good job. And yet, as you will see, perfectionism may be what is ultimately restricting them — and you — from desired success.
Here are five tips to overcome perfectionism to succeed in business.
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I’ve sat across from TODAY show hosts many times in the past few years. This time was super special!
To celebrate the launch of Better Than Perfect: 7 Strategies to Crush Your Inner Critic and Create a Life You Love The TODAY Show folks posted a lite version of my ‘Are You a Perfectionist?’ Quiz on their site. KL, Hoda and I discussed the score ranges and what they mean for people.
Watch the segment and get Better Than Perfect, which is available online an on bookshelves everywhere.
You can take the full version of my Perfectionist Assessment here. I’ll send you a personal score and analysis. As a bonus, I’ll include a link for you to download my e-book 10 Ways Perfectionism Poisons Your Life (And You May Not Know It!)
Thanks for your awesome support!
I originally wrote this for Everyday Health
After reading, I encourage you to take my ‘Are You a Perfectionist?’ Quiz
My name is Elizabeth, and I am a recovering perfectionist.
From striving for As in school to making dramatic efforts to be thin, I always pushed myself to be better, relentlessly seeking perfection. My perfectionism helped me achieve some significant things — academic awards, degrees, honors — that furthered my career. Because perfectionism is often rewarded in our society, I thought that if I were perfect, if I achieved all my goals, I would be happy.
But to the perfectionist, nothing is ever enough. The sought-for happiness never arrives because we’re so focused on what we haven’t accomplished, what we should have done. I constantly judged myself as not being good enough, and beat myself up for my failings. Because my sense of self-worth was conditional, my self-confidence was as well. I feared failure, and I feared how others saw me.
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You ARE #BetterThanPerfect!!!
My new book Better Than Perfect: 7 Strategies to Crush Your Inner Critic and Create a Life You Love is now available EVERYWHERE! Online and on the shelves of your local bookstore.
Better Than Perfect is filled with insights, anecdotes and tips and tools to help current and recovering perfectionists break free from “All or Nothing” thinking. Yes, I wrote BTP as psychologist and therapist, but it is more than that.
This is personal
I am also a recovering perfectionist. I know, firsthand, what the shackles of perfectionism feel like. I’ve not only helped scores of clients transform their thinking and their lives, I’ve done it myself.
The book is the foundation for my mission to banish perfectionism. Buy it Amazon, Barnes & Noble or your favorite bookstore. Before you flip the pages, take my ‘Are You A Perfectionist?’ Quiz and find out how much work we have to do together.
Sign up for my weekly insights and follow me on Twitter (@DrELombardo) and/or Facebook to stay in touch!
I’m honored to be the featured columnist for Better Homes and Gardens Good Kid Project. It’s a year long series of articles designed to give parents a boost as they do the important work of child-rearing in the 21st century. Here’s the latest; follow the links to enjoy the entire series to date.
Cultivating a “setbacks won’t stop me” mind-set starts as early as when kids are learning to tie their shoes. As children get older, developing grit becomes more about helping them work through their challenges and reach their goals in the face of roadblocks. In my latest article for BHG.com I present a few common academic and social situations your children might find themselves in, and how to help them persevere.
Read the full article at BHG.com
The Good Kid Project – Perseverance
“Moms neglect themselves in so many ways. Our society tells women ‘you should be able to do it all- and on your own.’ This is a completely unrealistic expectation, which sets moms up for stress, disappointment, guilt, and shame.”
Moms have to practice self-care, if even for the sake of their kids. In order to be the best mom, you need to be the best you. Not getting the sleep, nutrition, exercise, fun, or needed quiet time will make you more irritable, less energetic, more stressed, and less healthy — all of which can have a negative impact on your children. Read more of my insights and advice from this article on Procter & Gamble’s P&G Everday site.
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